In the world of today, the only thing you need to succeed is a smartphone, a decent filter, and a firm belief that your opinion on kale is, in fact, groundbreaking.
Let’s face it: becoming an influencer isn’t just a career choice; it’s a lifestyle. Forget about those dusty old professions like doctor, lawyer, or accountant. In the world of today, the only thing you need to succeed is a smartphone, a decent filter, and a firm belief that your opinion on kale is, in fact, groundbreaking.
But how do you break through the noise and become the next king or queen of the social media throne? Grab a latte, put on your most "effortlessly chic" outfit, and follow these foolproof steps to becoming the influencer you were always meant to be.
“My daughter wants to be an influencer, which, as a comedian, infuriates me.”Quote:
Nate Bargatze
Build a Persona (The Fancier, the Better)
No one wants to follow a real person—where’s the fun in that? Start by creating a persona that doesn’t resemble your actual self in any way. Are you a minimalist guru with a penchant for organic cotton towels? Great. Or perhaps you’re a self-proclaimed "adventure addict" who’s never actually seen a mountain, but you’re sure a hammock on your balcony counts as extreme sport? Even better.
The key here is consistency. Choose an aesthetic—“Vegan Superhero” or “Woke Chef” or “Traveling Techie”—and stick with it. No one needs to know the reality behind the curated feed. That’s for your therapist to worry about.
Invest in Gear (A.k.a. Spend Money to Make Money)
What’s an influencer without their gear? (A person, probably.) Get your hands on a high-end camera you don’t know how to use, a ring light that could double as a UFO, and a drone that makes you look like you might be on a secret government mission. You’ll need these gadgets to ensure every “candid” selfie looks like a Vogue cover shoot.
But here’s the thing: you don’t actually need to know how to use any of this tech. Just point, shoot, and pray. The magic of Instagram filters will do the rest. Just don’t forget the hashtags—#blessed, #sponsored, and #influencerlife are essential.
Have Opinions About Everything (Especially Things You Don’t Understand)
Being an influencer means having opinions, and lots of them. The more controversial, the better. Don’t know anything about the climate crisis? No worries, just post an inspirational quote about "saving the planet" and slap a picture of you sipping a coconut water on a beach somewhere. It’ll be fine.
When in doubt, take a strong stance on something you know nothing about. There’s always room for another hot take on whether pineapple belongs on pizza or if avocado toast is secretly the downfall of civilization. If it’s divisive, it’s probably a good idea to post about it.
Find Your Brand Ambassadorships (AKA: Start Getting Paid to Exist)
Here’s where the magic happens. Once you’ve built your persona, curated your feed, and offended a few people with your unsolicited opinions, it’s time to get paid. Brands are just waiting for you to endorse their products. Your followers need that new fitness tracker, even if you’ve never actually used one. Post a cute picture of you “working out” with it on your wrist, and watch the dollars roll in.
But remember—authenticity is key. Only promote things you truly believe in…or at least things that will make you look good and pay the bills. Your followers will never know the difference, and if they do, well, they’ll probably unfollow and start a rival influencer account.
Forget About Your Friends (They Don’t Have Wi-Fi Anyway)
As your influencer status rises, you’ll find that your true friends become, well, irrelevant. Sure, they’ve known you since middle school, but they don’t understand the pressure of being a thought leader on TikTok. So, go ahead—ditch them. After all, they’re probably still using Facebook.
Your new “friends” are the people who send you collaboration requests, or even better, the random strangers who will DM you saying, “I love your vibe, can we be besties?” Those are the connections that matter. Treat your followers like the gold they are—because, frankly, they are your new family.
Master the Art of Self-Promotion (Because Modesty is for Amateurs)
If you don’t shout from the rooftops about how amazing you are, did you even really achieve anything? The key to influencer success is shameless self-promotion. So, every post should be an opportunity to remind people just how fabulous you are. Did you eat an avocado toast? Post about it. Did you finally reach 10K followers? Brag about it. And don’t forget to thank your “followers” for “sticking by you” on your journey to influencer stardom.
The best part? You can even give yourself a nickname like “The Voice of a Generation” or “Queen of Content” and never have to explain it. The internet will buy into it. Eventually.
Keep It Real (But Not Too Real)
Becoming an influencer is all about cultivating the illusion of perfection while secretly existing in a chaotic whirlwind of unpaid collaborations and caffeine-fueled existential crises. But don’t worry, as long as you follow these steps, you’ll soon be that person—posing on beaches, giving unsolicited advice, and making everyone else feel like they’re doing life all wrong. You’ve made it.
Just don’t forget to thank your followers with a sponsored post once you get that first big check. They’ll be waiting to hear from you. And, of course, make sure to hashtag #influencerlife. Because, at the end of the day, it’s not about who you are—it’s about how many people believe you are who you say you are.
Summing Up
While the influencer world can sometimes feel like an endless parade of self-promotion and mindless chatter, it’s important to recognize that not all influencers are created equal. Many use their platform for good, offering insightful advice, valuable information, and meaningful entertainment. Some genuinely use their influence to drive positive change, from raising awareness about social issues to providing educational content that empowers their audiences. In an age where information is more accessible than ever, influencers have the power to shape public discourse, educate, and inspire.
There’s a fine line between those who strive to contribute something valuable and those simply chasing the next viral moment. The former know that their followers look to them for more than just a pretty picture—they seek real insights, entertainment, or support. These influencers understand the responsibility that comes with their platform and choose to use their reach for the betterment of others. They prioritize authenticity, creating content that resonates with their audience in a way that feels genuine and helpful.
On the other hand, there are those who thrive on attention, often blurring the line between entertainment and exploitation. For them, it’s less about the message and more about maintaining visibility, regardless of the impact. While they may boast high engagement numbers, the value they bring to their followers is often superficial, leaving their audiences questioning whether they’ve truly gained something worthwhile from the interaction.
As consumers of content, it’s up to us to distinguish between the two. With a little critical thinking, we can support those who add real value to our lives while also recognizing that not every post deserves our attention—or our trust. In the end, the true power of influencers lies not in their ability to gather followers but in their capacity to influence in a positive, lasting way.
